all we ever talk about is how much i like your dick or my drug problem.
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
porn star boner night. come get it.
I just got licked by a stripper, not so great anymore.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
CORAL IS FAR MORE RED THAN HER LIPS RED
Oh god you're Sonnet 130 drunk, aren't you.
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
I'm watching the Brazzers version of Mary Poppins and enjoying it. Volume on and all. 45 minutes.
"I'm not drinking any more tonight." As I dipped my quesadilla in a shot of tequila....then eats it
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
Randomize
