Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
they told you the "weed man" wouldn't come until you were asleep, like santa claus. you believed it.
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
I know its hard to believe that I'm already drunk at 12 p.m. but I am, so dont call me asking to go to the gym.
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
His dick is longer than my foot and I'm a size 9. I'm literally kicking myself in the vagina
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
in other news i'm homewrecking via instagram
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
Idk what was more embarassing, seeing her face when I finished, or seeing her roomates faces thru the door..
This little girl and her dad are walking behind me. "Why is he wearing pajamas?" Mind your own business, kid.
Because cocaine and lesbian hookups on a Tuesday cannot be the new normal
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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