That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
know what the best part about malls are? standing on the upper level and boob gazing
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
I just had a 30 minute fake cell phone conversation with myself just to avoid hooking up with the drunk guy next to me. its like an art form.
God damn. I'm really starting to resent babies. They're everywhere. Like fucking land mines.
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Randomize
