Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
i woke up with socks on this morning
so?
i didnt wear socks last night
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
Please, do not let 'babydaddy' catch on as your petname for me.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
Just think of all the blizzard sex people are having right now
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
Do you remember puking up your retainer into the toilet and putting it right back in your mouth?
You've been drinking wine and eating bacon all afternoon. HOW IS THAT DOING GOOD?!?!
Update... last night a man tried to bite my ear. I think he swallowed my pearl earring.
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
he's just got his life so together and it makes my pussy wet.
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