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• (413): View more from Massachusetts

  I think I just need to sleep with both of them to see which I want to date.

  (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  You just went from promiscuous to slut in 3.2 seconds.

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• (617): View more from Massachusetts

  she literally hasn't taken the mardi gras beads off in three days. she showered in them. TWICE.

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• (512): View more from Texas

  will emailing you the 64 kama sutra positions I want to try during the 3 days your here turn you on or terrify you?

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• (314): View more from Missouri

  The guy I wanted to make out with just got beat up, let's roll.

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• (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  Last night in my drunkenness I bought hurricane supplies which included a jug of wine and a bouquet of flowers. Apparently I'm going to woo Irene.

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• (806): View more from Texas

  Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.

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• (724): View more from Pennsylvania

  Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is

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• (775): View more from Nevada

  He brought a girl home so fat he called me before they got home to unlock the right side of the French doors

  (1-775): View more from Nevada

  Fuck he won the bet

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• (+61): View more from Australia

  he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms

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• (412): View more from Pennsylvania

  We hooked up for a while and on his way out he high fived me and said "stay weird"

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• (330): View more from Ohio

  in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.

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• (317): View more from Indiana

  You know what...ii have the turtles...were together....i love these god damn turtles...

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• (+44): View more from United Kingdom

  It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!

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• (407): View more from Florida

  help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.

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