Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Well the weddings in 4 days so I already got the eightball lined up and the wii fit all warmed up. Still wanna bet I wont lose 20 pounds by the wedding?
It was honestly the most delicious alcohol I've ever drank, plus the added risk of going blind from methanol poisoning really enhanced the experience.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
can't decide if i look like a hooker or a missing member of Poison today
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
Virginity is like the pottery barn-you break it, you bought it.
Thanks....I've always wanted my vagina compared to an overpriced coffee table
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
He's gonna be like you slept with too many of my friends and you're being voted off the island haha
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
Randomize
