By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
at FSU your more likely to get an STD than a parking spot
All I remember is yelling RUN as fireworks started going off in the kitchen. Who said that was a bad idea?
I swear this guy grew up in land without leagues. someone should inform him he's way out of mine
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
French fry pizza
Are you brilliant or just really high?
Can't it be both?
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
she was braiding my hair and singing forever young while she vommed everywhere at the same time. Talent.
I think you just have to raise your bang age from 40 to 50, hope dust doesn't fly out and make her say tony danza
You made me take a photo of you under the stairs at the bar. "Look I'm Harry Potter."
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Like you can't just be like oh bb and THEN SEND ME A FUCKING PICTURE OF MY 8TH GRADE FAT SELF IN A TACO COSTUME
Wait, but now I'm curious. In what position were y'all when the cops came? Were you guys butt ass naked in the car? 😂😂
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
Randomize
