I just woke up in bed next to my teacher. Does that mean I'm passing now?
wtf. i just found you're porn stash.
u like it?
NOT THE POINT.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
threw up in my backpack again. Asian guy I cheat from wasn't pleased.
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
He ate me out on the kitchen floor while we waited for the cake to bake. How was your Valentines Day?
He tried to tell me that he could handle his liquor better than "all the bitches in this town." AS HE THREW UP. ALL. OVER.
Reasonably certain my seventh grade teacher is encouraging me to drop acid on twitter
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
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