are you so shy because you have an std?
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
Dude you filled up a protein shake mixer with White Russians so you didn't have to keep coming upstairs.
You chucked an empty vodka bottle against the wall and yelled "Everyone calm the fuck down, it's just the cops." After 10 seconds of silence I looked over and saw you pissing their fountain.
Ordered a pizza stoned. The guy handed me my pizza and I tried to pay him by handing him back the pizza.
I was doing good, then they gave me free shots
It's just really funny to hear them talk about March for Life when literally every single one of those girls has had an abortion
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
