sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
He said "what's the haps". I don't know what the haps are but there goes his chances
We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
Well, I guess this was as good a night as any to find out I don't know how to use my fire extinguisher.
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
I am the worst sexter. i actually told him .. if i had a penis, it would be hard right now. BTW thats a turn off.
Would you get mad if I held a "how many dick pics can you get in one night" competition with my friend?
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Go forth my friend, but don't do any of that fruitful and multiplying shit.
Sitting in a waiting room with 15 children has me contemplating if I ever want to have sex again...
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
This toilet bowl is my home.
Randomize
