I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
He woke up from being passed out on the couch mumbled something that sounded like "Taco" then proceeded to the bathroom only to pass out again, I think we need to learn how to party like him!
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Did you mark a random day on my calendar as National Seth Day?
Sounds like a legit day to me.
i have officially smoked myself stupid. went to wally world to buy soap and toothpaste but got 4 potpies and 2 dessert pies instead. fail.
Randomize