why would she put his p in her m after it was in her a? that's gross
its gross she let him put his p in her a nevermind his p in her m after p in her v. cleaning up is necessary
i put my m on your v after my p was in your v. no big deal
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
I like to think of it as a lesbian feast.
Our room will be decorated with my urine.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
I'm sitting here listening to fat joe and doing kegels I have given up
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
my alarm on my phone broke at the bar sooo i had to sleep with someone so i'd wake up on time for work.
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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