Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
he asked me out through an event invitation on facebook, the title read Romantic Dinner For 2
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
I was woken up at 4am by a stranger shaking my foot who said I looked like I needed a cigarette.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I dunno, there's just something so\ncomforting about having his penis in my mouth.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
my drug dealer is also my eyebrow lady. Two birds, one stone.
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
I'm at the drive thru window, five minutes out. If the bathtub is empty or you're dressed when I arrive I'm not sharing.
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