I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
I just woke up in bed with 4 girls. Either i dont remember the best night of my life or they think im gay.
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
And apparently midway I said "hurry up and finish so we can talk about what a bad idea this was"
I really dont wanna go to a traffic light party. I have nothing red to pretend I'm taken with. Without something red my "my girlfriend is away in the mines" story wont work.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
I think the best course of action at this point is to cut his balls off to get him to stop reproducing
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
We inadvertently arrived at the strip club on Bear Night. The dancers all look like young Santa Claus and there's a buffet....
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