Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I think it's just because she's got "I'll sleep with anyone with a decent car" written all over her face.
i asked a few people if they wanted to make pancakes with me but no one would. thats why i'm drunk by myself right now
She played chubby bunny with our cocks.. She got 4
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
thats the coolest thing thats happened to my vagina since i dated that guy from portugal.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
Mm. I just want to eat pancakes off of his fine ass.
Dude my doctor just legit got down on her knees and loudly begged me to do my pap smear
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
He woke up and decided to go for a swim in the lake... At about 3am... With his dogs
Randomize
