ill give you a picture of me naked for $5. im desperate.
just asked if they'd gift wrap go-go taquitos for you at 7-eleven
It was the worst sex ever. All she did was tap on my balls with her hands like she was in a reggae band.
I'm pretty sure whiskey overrules bulimia in the eyes of Texas boys
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
I thought you wanted to talk?
What part of "Lets have angry sex" means I want to talk?
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
You kept saying "this bitch", mumbled incoherently for like 5 minutes, took a shot, and kept going.
It's two in the afternoon, I'm on my third glass of wine and I'm watching Lambchop on youtube. How do you think I feel right now?
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Its 8 in the morning and I wouldn't pass a breathalyzer test, How's your day been?
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
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