i think if you made a shrine it would be creepy
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Precisely. She's an awesome drinking companion; yet, not so awesome mother-in-law material.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Dave got tied up again. I'm done breaking into girls houses to cut him loose. At least before noon.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
We were talking when all of a sudden she reach and started squeezing my dick and goes "nice." and then just kept the conversation going like nothing happened.
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Also, I found your gauge.
I found it under my pillow like a gift from the Sex Fairy.
You know that if they offer you a bagel they are determined to sleep with you, right?
i survived drinking for 24 hours, an 8 ball of cocaine and a threesome. I think you can handle moving.
I have mystery bruises on my right knee, right arm, under my chin, and on my forehead. What the fuck happened last night??
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
Randomize
