Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
he asked me to "shake his dick" when he introduced himself, playing naked football with you in our living room. $100 says you two get married one day.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
Nothing is creepier than a guy telling you "I was just thinking about you" in a men's bathroom when taking a shit
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I am. I woke up on someone's front lawn dressed as max Payne also be proud.
All I know, is I had green sex and beer and got driven home. That's it.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
WEED BROWNIES! He put weed in my brownie mix! And he got it from YYYYOOOOUUUU!
Look at the bright side mom. After 20 years dad is still capable of surprising you!
Shut up Max.
You peed in the sink and kept shouting "I'm the black swan! Ca-caw!"
Randomize