The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
My boss' voice literally gives me gas
What kind of soap washes out shame, bad decisions, and whiskey?
Irish Spring?
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
I wonder what a non-hungover friday at work is like
I like that we make it a requirement to howl at the moon every time we get drunk together.
I almost got on a bus to Langley Air Force Base. 99% sure that's not where I wanna be.
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Yeah I don't think your wife thinks it's a good thing that you're fucking your cousin.
I wanna suck that fisherman's dick.
It wasn't intentional or anything but I've now had sex with all of your siblings. How's college going?
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