Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
well he's currently spooning the coffee table
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
just heard this guy tell a story about how he got boat head. i want his life
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
After he came all he could say was how great the lighting fixtures where in my apartment.
We stuck the straw in the bourbon as a joke, you saw it as a challenge.
He came over in a blaze orange vest with a case of beer and a shotgun yelling about "Dove Season" then passed out in the lawn. There he lies
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
IT TOOK ME LIKE AN HOUR TO DO THAT. DO YOU KNOW HOW HARD IT IS FOR ME TO CONCENTRATE ON ONE THING FOR AN ENTIRE HOUR?!
Yupp. He's definitely a screamer.
It finally happened my mom knowingly gave me money to buy drugs i knew this day would come\n
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
How did I end up with the cock ring?!
I just realized now that I slept with him while he was still wearing the maid costume... I've reached a new level of sexual freakness.
Randomize
