I'm missing my class because I'm not done with my beer
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
just gave him road head on the way home IN A SNOW STORM..good thing we didn't crash or I'd be dead. I DIDN'T HAVE MY SEATBELT ON
clearly you have your priorities straight
Actions speak louder than pants.
God you better not be texting me after just having sex with someone from craigslist
She woke up with blood running down her face and asked the EMS guy where the keg was
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
I have reached the state of intoxication where it is now a requirement to sit while peeing.
Get in your clown car, pick up everyone you know, and head to the park. drunk Sledding grand prix tonight. winner takes home the leftover beer
Dude, did you fall in a toilet on the way over here?
Was face down in one actually. Bars 2, Drew 0.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
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