so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
She announced her abortion via fbk
I love how my brain works. It's like being on drugs without the costly upkeep.
wicked high...have munchies. cherry flavor lube. problem solved.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
Thank you, bloody toiletpaper I found in the hamper. I was worried that today was going to be boring.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
We're all getting matching jack daniels tattoos. We're gonna be an alcoholic gang of awesome.
Having vodka and cokes for lunch at work today because absolutely ZERO fucks are being given.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Every time I look at him 'Relax' by Frankie Goes to Hollywood plays in my head. Is that weird?
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