oh right, i forgot that not everyone has a go-to blowjob
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
It smells like ranch
Must be all the white people
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
Girl at work pointed out that the blood vessels around my eyes were all popped and I smell like puke
we were sitting in the kitchen and you kept biting my shoulder saying "itll all be over soon"
We made out a little and then he gave me some weed. I would say it was a pretty productive stop on my way home
Well I'm going to San Francisco next weekend for pride. I'm sure I'll end up drunk and on a beach at some point.
No, it's like a legit blood drive. It's not just her out in some parking lot with needles and ziplock bags
that awkward moment when you use blowjob jokes as a segue into coming out as bi
Randomize
