All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
Do vagina's smell?
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
it will be an insanely irresponsible summer.the only things i plan on not doing are dying and getting pregnant.and even those are negotiable
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
Just found out my rents have been paying my siblings to cockblock me for the past 5 years
Not as covert as you thought huh?
Dude, did you know, your blood is contaminated with over 17 non-beer fluids?
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
You're not horrible. Thank you for my pandas.
Woke up this morning with Nerf Bullets stuck to everything in my house and nut in my belly button. What exactly happened last night?
Getting robbed by hookers is def a right of passage in a mans life
Can't we just go back to fucking and having your boyfriend think you're completely straight?
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
No bra. No panties. Makeup from last night. At work right now. I am trash.
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