Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
i am not allowed to pick the men i sleep with anymore
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
I have a spoon shaped bruise on my ass...
Just considered the plausability of using my detachable showerhead as a beer bong. Has my life really devolved to this?
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I just ate a raisin that tasted like wine. Is this real life or is this my body trying to tell me it's Friday and I should be drinking right now?
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Give me the sexing that I truly desire and I will reveal to you the mysterious location of the PBR's
Randomize
