And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
I slept with some guy because he drew a dinosaur on my arm
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
You were in the garage half naked counting your ribs and talking about how you had too many
We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
yeah dropping that class because i really don't want to be known as the girl who fell asleep in class and threw up as she walked out for an entire semester
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
Friend as in 'I used to have sex with her' or friend as in 'I still want to have sex with her'?
Cause I know you wanna ride the D like a Vespa in ROMAN HOLIDAY
HE’S PUKING UP BLOOD
okay all good I mistook strawberita for blood...
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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