His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
yeh she's definitely getting a ham and plan b omelette in the morning
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
I'm still not a hundred percent.. I haven't shit anything solid in two days.. I have pulled my puker muscles and I can't take deep breaths cuz of other unidentified muscles/maybe heart attack
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Drinks have officially taken priority over self-respect, and I'm not even all that torn up about it.
We have massive handle of kettle and a rack of hi life
That's the happiest ive ever been at 7:48 am....
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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