I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
Also...you were trying to touch his balls without him noticing
He just came in my nostril. Never look down when a guy is pulling out during missionary.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
She shouted out halfway through "that costume does nothing to hide your cock". Last time we let her drink at the theatre.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I am stoned at Disneyland with my little brother. It's gonna be a good day.
You kept insisting you found queso that's better than oral sex
I might run out into oncoming traffic. Id rather break my legs and/or die then continue with today.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
i came so much i feel like i were to try again, only dust would come out. and maybe glitter
Randomize
