He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
Seriously, stop being so datable w your movie/song prefs
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
I'm gonna stay in bed all day and watch porn in an attempt to stay warm.
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
Walked into the bar with my burrito and ordered a round of shots for everyone. Not sure if I want to look at the credit card statement.
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
I think my penis runs off weed. I haven't smoked it 3 days and I have no sex drive what so ever
I need to be her Aladdin, and show her the world. The sex world.
Walking into my bedroom & smelling stale sex & disappointment isn't how I envisioned being 39, in case you were wondering.
I hit an all time low we ran out of coke and I met up with my dealer at 8 in the morning for a re-up. great customer service though.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I swear I'm going to walk in one day with you in a ballgag just masturbating feverishly
Well i can't stand the sound of my own crying
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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