Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
he was shitfaced drunk and couldn't walk but could still recite the top 10 in order from the first season of american idol. impressive
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
he was banged his ex for coke the whole time and is still the best guy so far this year. standards need to be raised.
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I just crawled out of bed at 5AM to make her a peanut butter and Nutella sandwich. Somewhere in the distance, I could hear whips cracking.
Dude. Once again. Cleaning house. Found weed I hid from myself a month ago. Celebrating/testing it out. if i dont text back in 10, call dominos.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
There's a lady lying down on the sidewalk in front of our building smoking a cig
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
For starters i called the cops on myself for trying to destroy the ladys decorations
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
She's like a squirrel. She spazzes out all the time.
Randomize