Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Sorry you had to hear me puke. I didn't know I called you. Was it graceful?
The bartender let me pay my bar tab with my itunes giftcards.
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
I'm so glad I was blacked out while I was going all exorcist in the bathroom. That's so not a memory I want.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
a victory without nudity is not really a victory
I didn't know how to commemorate his death, so I snorted a fat line off of his obituary. Rest in peace.
The last thing I remember is being given a cup full of absinthe and deciding I needed to wear my tool belt
You were returned to the hotel by someone wearing a priest costume and carrying knives.
Randomize
