she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Realistically anyone can come I don't care it's Boston what do I own boston? No. I just don't want people who are gonna give me "why are you doing that" kinda look when I take birthday shots out of my birthday babe shot glass necklace.
So I'm thinking next semester you should be my own personal maid, nurse, masseuse and chef in exchange for free lodging, any food you can find, and unlimited access to my reproductive organs.
She had caution tape on her head and she blew me.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
What if he turns back to me, finds me seemingly fondling my breasts, and thinks I'm turned on by eagles?
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
You kept licking me last night.... and said I tasted like jello. Next time, lay off the jello shots, okay?
Randomize