I swear I am going to pee, wipe my vag with my hand, and then slap you in the face with it.
what if cement was really a rainbow color they just secretly paint it grey so as not to distract drivers
are you high?
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
my hip hurts so fuckin bad. and I just found a half eaten burrito in my nightstand drawer.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
"Just cut me in half. Then take half of me home. And leave the other half here. Cuz I can't see."
My tuesday consisted of speaking to a federal agent for two hours and watching a roving band of gypsies jump over a fire until 2:30am
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
we managed to melt a few different forms of plastic into the cannibutter....
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Come over so I can fuck you louder than her country music
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
Do toy wanna orseer frim onedof tjose plaves? Sry textimg with globes on
Gloves*
Out of all the words to correct, you chose gloves??
Randomize
