if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
She uses my penis to point at the tv when we talk about the shows. I love her
And you just kept trying to fit through the dog door and not drop Jello shots.
I'm fucking an ugly guy. Don't come home.
well now I have to
She said I came to for a minute, shouted IHOP!! and then shook my head and said no before passing out again
I'll make a Jello mold of your face so everyone can get drunk off your face
Could have been worst, could have seen me bent over biting her carpet while her son was inside me, i think i would have respnded with "i was just trying to be quiet"
Just saw identical twins riding scooters. Today is not real who the hell rides a scooter anymore
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Yay! Also. When you're coming down eat waffles and touch yourself. You won't regret it.
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
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