You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
The guy in the cast riped the tap off the keg and hit steve with it
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I looked into this "it's just lunch" matchmaker thing and it was like 5 grand. If I'm gonna spend five grand I'll throw in another three and get new tits and find my own fucking husband.
Randomize
