Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
I don't know. I woke up in the back of a cab in a drive thru line at whataburger with police lights flashing and my friend yelling" you didn't have to sell us out phil!" to the cab driver.
And then he proceeded to take my heartbeat, because apparently that tells him whether I was faking or not...
You are too young to settle down enjoy your life. The window to get drunk and have casual sex with strangers gets smaller by the day.
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
Let's put it this way. Mom is bringing me a new shirt and I smell like lube.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
Did I tell you he put a lobster carcass on his dick?
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
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