love makes seman taste better
So she comes up to me at the end of the night and asks me if I going to take her home and fuck her. I pretty much had to right?
you had an obligation.
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
Its not personal, its just business. I'm the Donald Trump of blowjobs.
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
CRAIGSLIST IS NOT THE ANSWER
IM LONELY AND HORNY
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
Just found a note on the bed that said "Dear mittens, had to leave early I'll be back soon."
WTF? Are you mittens?
Such a big mess for such a small penis
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