So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
we put the last xanax in the middle and played hungry hungry hippos to see whod get it
fair is fair
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
then he asked me if i wanted to "handle his wingman"
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Tell me when you get here. I'm drinking beer in the bushes next to your house, and I put my hoodie up because I was cold. Pretty sure everyone lowkey thinks i'm homeless.
At the ER, will you come pick me up... Had an allergic reaction, wanted to see if I could eat a peanut without dying... Do you how bad this is evolutionary, I would have died back in the days of survival of the fitest by now
I plan on just grabbing someone's dick if I have to. They will know what's up. Why else do you go to a bar alone on valentines day?
Judging by the progress I've made since I woke up (none) I'm thinking this hangover may keep me in bed.
Definitely had a dick in my ass while watching the Seahawks win. Best NFC Championship game ever.
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
you told me you wanted to be a soccer mom with a high tolerance then you put the bottle to your face
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
Randomize
