I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
a mothers knocking is a guaranteed boner softener
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
I got to the point where it seemed like she had 8 giant breasts instead of just two
I'm home and safer than post-menopausal sex; you're welcome for the image. And yes, I did just use a semi-colon hammered.
on the way to the hospital you kept asking if we could stop at the bar first. then you proceeded to puke out the window
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
Blacked out, Had to be carried out of the bar again by two large black bouncers. Asked them to be my "boo thangz" Again.
Home safe. Took me everything not to stop and pick up some random cat that looked like an ocelot tho.
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
It's alright. I'm just trying to make her realize you're not good enough for her.
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Randomize
