Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
the tile , carpet , walls , cabinets , even the ceiling ... there is Jello everywhere
it was your idea to have indoor Jello wrestling man
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Find out what day classes start and I will come down to Richmond that weekend. Any broad who claims to be 18-21 will be promptly ID'd. My job has trained me to spot a fake from a mile away, and I don't need a statutory rape charge.
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
I got propositioned while wearing the bottom half of a horse costume. It's like god is apologizing to me in the strangest of ways.
We have bigger issues at hand... Does anybody know someone in the kalamazoo area that is missing a pair of stilts ?
Just bought condoms with a walmart gift card. Thanks grandma.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
Her hot older sister walked in on us, looked me up and down, then stared straight at her and said "I call sloppy seconds on this one" then left. I'm still debating on how I feel about that.
Good morning beautiful! Wanna steal a cat this weekend?
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