You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
Guess who just hooked up with the cop that fingerprinted her?
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
My dream of watching a live dick sword fight might never be realized now. Currently sobbing, shots to follow
Tomorrow after you go to the library to look up gay porn, I'm going to come to your apartment to paint a nude portrait of you. Get pumped, plopernickle.
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
He literally stole all the change that was on my floor and ran away while I was peeing. I have to rethink my standards.
Here’s how sick I am. I’m not hungry. I don’t want coffee. And I don’t want dick. So, you know it’s bad.
Wish me luck on my new penis adventure
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