Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
is facebook stalking your hot therapist socially acceptable?
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
I found him in bed on a pullout couch with another dude. He had two empty puke buckets and his empty bottle of jagermeister right by his head.
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
So bored. I think I've expelled every last gram of jizz from my body.
My aunt asked how many piercings I had and my mom said seven and I said nine and that's how my family found out I had my nipples pierced.
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
YOU'RE NOT THE ONE BEING EVISCERATED BY YOUR OWN UTERUS SO GET SOME DAMN SLEEP YOU FOOL!
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
It’s gonna be hard being interviewed by this girl without remembering the time she showed me her nipple piercings at Dylan’s party
Randomize
