I think I'm going to be in trouble for sneaking out last night. My Dad saw me drive up this morning when he was leaving early for work.
What'd you say?
I told him I was sleep driving
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
If I could have all the money back from the pregnancy test i've bought- I could buy myself a vacation.
Or a large amount of condoms?!?
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I was sitting on the floor of CVS chugging white grape juice until someone asked me to leave.
She screams like she's just fallen out of a helicopter when she cums.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
then she lifted her dress, tweaked her own nipples, and then ordered another round for everyone. this place is wild at 9pm.
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I mean my dick does have feeling again, which is a step in the right direction
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
i woke up to a text from someone I put in my phone last night as "Giant Penis"
what did G.P. say?
oddly enough it was a dick pic
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
Randomize
