He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
I was more traumatized by the table collapsing while i was going down on you.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
Theres been so much buildup for our genitals to meet, one or both of us is sure to be disappointed.
You're probably reading this when you wake up from your "nap" in the front yard. Maybe next week you should go to class, and not start Thirsty Thursday at 9:30 in the morning.
Gym?
Sweet baby Jebus, no. I'm Motley Crue hungover. This must be how it feels to rail a line of ants.
Then you bent down and whispered, "excuse me mr. Stair, could you please stop moving?"
We joked about how funny it would be if he got pulled over with 300 breakfast burritos in hus car. We walk outside of the school just as the police lights turn on and pull him over
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
As we were leaving a memorial service last night he turns to me and says, is it too soon for a post funeral blowie?
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Well, he kept asking me if I was going to murder him once we got upstairs. It sort of killed the mood.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
Randomize
