it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
things I have learned from cosmo today- 40% of guys are uncircumsized, you can have a beer facial, and i really need to get tested for std's
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
Life Lesson #1 of 2013: double-fisting shower beers and shaving my bikini line should be reserved for two different showers.
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
I've lost every trace of self esteem. Even sneaking a BJ in the coffee room has lost it's luster.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
You don't understand. This boy has the Mona Lisa of cocks.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
