Oh and I watched laurens last episode on the hills. its been an emotional day
hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Who ate shrimp cocktail in my bathroom last night?
I was lying there too hungover to move when my dog jumped onto my bed and set half a calzone on my pillow. Best. Dog. Ever.
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
Never admit to being cold at those things. That is how you end up waking up the next morning naked under animal pelts... or so I have heard.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
Randomize