I wanna eat
then frost
then eat your cupcake
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Im sending over a girl who thinks youre in the next twilight movie
your the best winggirl ever
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
Remind me tomorrow to take that ball-gag out of my purse.
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
At least you didn't wake up next to your professor who then proceeded to cancel class via phone while still inside of me.
I just blew thrown up hashbrowns out my nose. That's the level of this hangover.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
Pornhub is actually a very wholesome website
YOU WAXED MY CAT YOU SICK FUCK
not even sure this counts as hungover but like my body can't exist in reality today
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