don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
remind me not buy ky at kmart ever again. Had to get a manager to open the locked case. then he stood there and watched me look through the selection
I hate that ur telling me this.
she then came into the room and yelled I'M GOING TO BE A COCK BLOCK for 5 minutes
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Im drinking in homer but I guess Egan got arrestest on an "assault by water ballon" charge but tom actually threw the water balloon in question at the bartender.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Your cousin just asked the bartender to start a round of vagina shots. Not body shots. Vagina shots. We're taking her out more often.
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I don't think you understand. I woke up under the car. At 3 am. In the club parking lot.
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I was taking this cougar home in the middle of the night I walked across the hall all naked to take a piss and ran into to some chick from highschool she said no way you are fucking my mom ran into her moms room and started yelling at her
Randomize
