We're facebook friends in real life
let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
If they ask for a stool sample we r no longer friends.
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
I was holding her hair back and when she quit puking she told me she's been saving her scissor virginity for me.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
You called your ex's vag an "AIDS Pinata". Drunk You is the Hulk Hogan of insults.
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
Just witnessed some guy throw his fake eye at his dad's face. Actually, he whipped it at him.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Randomize
