Just watched a porn with the dvd commentary on i think i need to re-evaluate my life
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
woke up to see a man wearing a sailor hat and covered in vomit sneaking out the door. Epic night indeed.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Blonde girl lying face-down, passed out next to my bed, walls are covered in guacamole. College is looking excellent.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
Are you seriously getting this frustrated over a hand-job right now?
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
In my defense, the second lapdance I gave was because of a dare.
Randomize
